Wrinkled knees, chicken neck... yeah, the physical aspects of getting older are, well, a lot. But for me, it's the mental and emotional shifts that have been truly powerful. The quiet realization that I've got more years behind me than ahead, and how ridiculously fast time seems to fly, has kicked off a complete recalibration of everything.
I've been looking back at that young, idealistic kid I used to be, the one with big dreams. I never quite became the artist I imagined, mostly because the fear of being a "starving artist" was a loud whisper. And then there was my dad's ever-present voice, a constant reminder to "get a business degree," which, of course, I did. In college, I even flirted with the idea of being an art teacher, but quickly discovered that repeating myself (or frankly, talking much at all) isn't exactly my favorite pastime. What I do love, though, is making stuff. Creating things with my hands – art, jewelry, crochet, clay, sewing, painting. All of it. Now, that desire to get back to my core, my creative, artist self, has become relenting and something I can't ignore.
This isn't just a midlife whim, it has taken on a profound urgency in recent years. Life, as I've come to know, is painfully short. That truth was hammered home with the passing of both my parents, far too young in their 60s, my dad in 2018 and my mom in 2019, both after long illnesses. Then, in 2022, my stepmom left us suddenly, and that hit hard too. These losses, coming in such quick succession, were an undeniable wake-up call. They made me realize that I had to do this now, or I might truly never get the chance. My creative self, the part of me that genuinely feels "ON" and alive, is practically screaming to breathe freely again.
Of course, my decades in corporate marketing have been positive and successful. I learned an incredible amount, worked with smart, wonderful people, and yes, paid the mortgage. Check, check, check. It definitely built skills I'm genuinely grateful for – strategy, discipline, how to talk to humans (which, admittedly, still isn't my strongest suit – perhaps that's my GenX-ness showing). But after all that, it's time to re-evaluate. For me, 2025 has become my year of rediscovery.
I haven't been entirely idle on the creative front. I've had my polymer clay era, my pour painting era, and an everlasting crochet era. And, of course, I made my jewelry era permanent with the establishment of Kerry Best Designs on Etsy in 2014 (still where I am busy making jewelry and gifts). So I've spent years making jewelry, mostly after hours. All that making always felt less like work and more like breathing; it kept the pilot light lit. But it was always relegated to the margins, never quite front and center.
Here's a quote from a recent Sefirot creative bulletin that really speaks to me:
None of this comes from the mind. The mind wants the best for us, it wants the path from A to B to be linear and simple. Find a secure job; duty first, then pleasure; make the safest, most reasonable choices. It makes a lot of sense—but there’s no emotion, and therefore no energy.
That's it, Energy!
So, I'm officially starting the clock on a transition. My plan is to dedicate the rest of this year (2025) to seriously prepping to take Kerry Best Designs (or whatever this evolving creative venture becomes) full-time in 2026. This means purposefully expanding beyond jewelry into all the other creative things I love – painting, drawing, fiber arts, maybe some adventures with clay. We'll see. Basically, I'm shifting the "art thing" to be the main thing - at least for a while. It's about me taking responsibility for my own reality and consciously choosing to awaken that creative spirit I felt before the world and corporate jobs subtly nudged it to feel... less important. It's time for me to demolish those external and internal blocks – my worries about what other people might think, my feelings about what I 'should' be doing – and truly embrace my own urge to create.
Why am I blogging about it? Well, partly it's my way of documenting, of figuring things out by writing them down. It's also a bit of public accountability, making it harder for me to back out easily. 😉 Mostly, though, it feels like a genuine way to process this huge shift openly. And who knows, maybe my stumbling through this will offer a little light (or at least some entertainment) for others who are also trying to make more room for their creative selves.
Here's what I'm diving into for 2025:
What I'm Planning for 2025: My Creative Journey Unfolds
- An Ambush?: I picked up "The Creative Ambush" by Matteo di Pascale. It sounds intriguing, maybe even a little ominous, but the first chapter hooked me. I believe it'll be a useful guide for this adventure.
- Making Stuff (or Trying To): Hoping to include reports from the studio front lines (as soon as I get my studio setup, that is). That means paint splatters, dirty fingernails, tangled yarn, and if I'm lucky, some finished pieces.
- Finding the Spark: This is about actively seeking inspiration. If I had to guess, it'll probably involve a lot of dirt, flowers, trees, and rocks – it's almost always a connection with nature that sparks something.
- The Logistics: Shifting gears from a corporate brain to an artist brain. That, my friends, should be... something.
Honestly, it doesn’t feel like a reckless leap into the deep end. It feels more like finally deciding to explore that dirt road I've been driving past for years, the one I never had the time to investigate. I'm finally prioritizing what feeds my soul - creative energy.
So, that's the plan. I'm not guaranteeing it'll be smooth, but it feels right. Feel free to check it out. Or don't. Whatever works. 😉 But I'm genuinely glad you stopped by.
Adventure awaits…
Kerry